Diaries of a Pregnant Momma
I've started getting a little round belly finally and am finally feeling like I'm truly pregnant. For the first trimester, all I felt was sick all day, every day, with nothing to show for it. They say that the first trimester is definitely the toughest, and I believe them! Now that I've settled into my second, I've finally started to feel better and actually have a little more energy. It's amazing, I didn't believe anyone when they said I'd start to feel better soon, but it was almost over night, give or take a couple days, that I felt a difference into my second trimester. Woo!!
Now, a whole different stage has started where I'm beginning to think about breastfeeding, labor, the nursery, names, and most importantly, how I'm going to raise my child. I believe every mom probably goes through the same things and it's different for everyone just like every family is different. I've started thinking about things that I've never thought about before like; what kind of discipline are we going to administer, what belief system will our child grow up with, will they go to public school or private school, how am I going to start saving for THEIR future. Pretty heavy stuff actually. And sometimes I'll admit, it's a bit overwhelming. If you ask any new mom, they'll tell you that there is always a never ending supply of "advice" from everyone. Anyone and everyone who has an opinion about raising a child will give it to you and they're all the "right" way. That is almost the MOST overwhelming part of it all. But what I've learned is that most of that will come on it's own. Tony and I have of course talked about what direction we'd like to take and are on the same page about things thankfully, but I don't think we'll know what to do until it happens. All we know for sure, is that we'd like to teach our child to be the best person they can be. To come into this world and leave it a better place when they leave it. I think as long as our child has that mindset, it's really not going to matter (in the bigger picture) how they choose to do it. Both Tony and I (for the most part) have parents that did basically the same thing. We were given the ability to make our own decisions our what we believe, although we were given a good Christian foundation, and we were taught to always be kind, respectful, and honest. And hey, I think we turned out pretty good, so good job Mom and Dad! ;)
There are so many things that I'm enjoying about pregnancy. I LOVE hearing the heartbeat. I've had the oppertunity to see Baby D twice on a sonogram and have heard the heartbeat three times and I just cry everytime. It truly is an amazing experience carrying your child. Not that I'm against adoption AT ALL because I know that can be just as rewarding, but I'm really happy that I am able to carry our little one. There's a bond that you start to form as time goes on that I never knew. I spend my days talking to baby and singing to baby and just holding my belly because it makes me feel like I'm holding baby. I'm still pretty early in my pregnancy (15 weeks) so I'm sure it will just get better from here. :)
Even with all those wonderful things I'm experiencing and the love that I have for Baby D already, there are definitely some things that are rough, and you just don't know about them until you know. I'll admit that some days, especially in the first three months, I just felt hopeless. The thing that really got to me most, was that on those days, I felt like if I complained about it, I was betraying my baby. I tried for a good long ten months to get pregnant and when I FINALLY am, I'm complaining about it. There were also people that kind of fed into that idea as well by saying, "don't you start complaining about it because you wanted this" or "you knew what you were getting yourself into". To that, I have to say shut up. To myself and to those people. Because honestly, you DON'T know what you're getting yourself into when you get pregnant for the first time. All the preparation in the world could not prepare you for what you have to deal with. Not to mention that the day you get that positive pregnancy test, your entire life changes. You have to completely change the way you eat, the way you sleep, the things you take for ailments, and only YOU are responsible for that human life for nine, sometimes ten months. That's heavy stuff! And anyone who has not done it before, really has no right to say anything about it. One thing I've gained since being pregnant is a stronger backbone and I'm not afraid to tell you what I think (not that I've had THAT much of an issue with that before...). haha! I've told a few people to shut it (politely) or that I can see why they think something, but they really don't understand and I'd rather not have your opinion. haha! I'm surprised with myself because I wouldn't normally come right out with it, I'd just nod and go about my business. All that is to say, being pregnant is not for the weak. I respect all women who have done it before me and all who are doing it now. I'm thankful for this blessing and am also human which means, sometimes I just need someone to offer support and say, what can I do to help. Even if there's nothing that can be done, it means a lot to me. I do try not to open myself up for everyone to tell me what to think by posting complaints or issues on Facebook for everyone to comment on, or by telling random people about my issues like so many people I know have, and then get upset when they get a negative response. I feel like if you do that, you're kind of asking for it. I don't want to do that to myself, so if I have trusted you enough to complain about anything I'm experiencing, it's because I trust you to be supportive. To all my lovely friends, family, and my husband who get to share that experience with me, you should feel honored. ;) lol!
I have to give my husband another shout out because not only am I learning how to deal with pregnancy, he is too. Sometimes he doesn't understand what I mean or what I'm going through, but he has thanked me multiple times for carrying his child. I believe there's nothing else in your marriage that can make a man respect his wife more, than to go nine months creating a life. Obviously he helped create that life, but the mom obviously does the heavy lifting. I'm one of the lucky ones that has a man that is truly supportive and loving no matter what happens and I am thankful for that every day. Tony is going to be an amazing father and I just can't wait to see Baby D in his arms. :')
All in all everything is going pretty smoothly and I continue to do my best to take the best care of myself and Baby D. My next appointment (May 30) we'll get to find out if we are having a boy or girl so stay tuned! I know everyone says they just want a happy and healthy baby and they don't care what the sex is, and that's definitely true for me. I want a boy and I also want a girl so I couldn't be happier to find out either way so I can assign a name to little Baby D. Not too long after we find out, I'll be on a plane headed home for a good long week! All my Boise friends better set some time aside for me because I miss you all so much! Here are a couple fun pictures I've taken since the last post:
My FABULOUS mother pulled off getting this amazing travel system (originally $399) for $145 with her discounts at Kohls. I'm SO excited about this stroller/carseat, I've been pushing it around the house since I got it. Plus the girls are happy about it too. ;)
I debated whether or not I was going to rock the bikini belly for a bit but finally gave in. My friend Joanna tells me that "creating a life is beautiful, show it off!" so I am. Right now, I kinda look like I've just drank too much beer, but this new suit makes me feel comfortable and have already hit the beach once in it. Oh, and Ava loves to photobomb as you can tell..
I got home from work one night and thought, "I think my belly grew from this morning..." and it probably did! Hello baby!
Shout out to the Amazing Sondra for getting this awesome hoodie for me!! I've already decided that unless I know you, if you try to touch my belly you're going to get karate chopped! haha! This hoodie says it for me though! Love it!!
Now, a whole different stage has started where I'm beginning to think about breastfeeding, labor, the nursery, names, and most importantly, how I'm going to raise my child. I believe every mom probably goes through the same things and it's different for everyone just like every family is different. I've started thinking about things that I've never thought about before like; what kind of discipline are we going to administer, what belief system will our child grow up with, will they go to public school or private school, how am I going to start saving for THEIR future. Pretty heavy stuff actually. And sometimes I'll admit, it's a bit overwhelming. If you ask any new mom, they'll tell you that there is always a never ending supply of "advice" from everyone. Anyone and everyone who has an opinion about raising a child will give it to you and they're all the "right" way. That is almost the MOST overwhelming part of it all. But what I've learned is that most of that will come on it's own. Tony and I have of course talked about what direction we'd like to take and are on the same page about things thankfully, but I don't think we'll know what to do until it happens. All we know for sure, is that we'd like to teach our child to be the best person they can be. To come into this world and leave it a better place when they leave it. I think as long as our child has that mindset, it's really not going to matter (in the bigger picture) how they choose to do it. Both Tony and I (for the most part) have parents that did basically the same thing. We were given the ability to make our own decisions our what we believe, although we were given a good Christian foundation, and we were taught to always be kind, respectful, and honest. And hey, I think we turned out pretty good, so good job Mom and Dad! ;)
There are so many things that I'm enjoying about pregnancy. I LOVE hearing the heartbeat. I've had the oppertunity to see Baby D twice on a sonogram and have heard the heartbeat three times and I just cry everytime. It truly is an amazing experience carrying your child. Not that I'm against adoption AT ALL because I know that can be just as rewarding, but I'm really happy that I am able to carry our little one. There's a bond that you start to form as time goes on that I never knew. I spend my days talking to baby and singing to baby and just holding my belly because it makes me feel like I'm holding baby. I'm still pretty early in my pregnancy (15 weeks) so I'm sure it will just get better from here. :)
Even with all those wonderful things I'm experiencing and the love that I have for Baby D already, there are definitely some things that are rough, and you just don't know about them until you know. I'll admit that some days, especially in the first three months, I just felt hopeless. The thing that really got to me most, was that on those days, I felt like if I complained about it, I was betraying my baby. I tried for a good long ten months to get pregnant and when I FINALLY am, I'm complaining about it. There were also people that kind of fed into that idea as well by saying, "don't you start complaining about it because you wanted this" or "you knew what you were getting yourself into". To that, I have to say shut up. To myself and to those people. Because honestly, you DON'T know what you're getting yourself into when you get pregnant for the first time. All the preparation in the world could not prepare you for what you have to deal with. Not to mention that the day you get that positive pregnancy test, your entire life changes. You have to completely change the way you eat, the way you sleep, the things you take for ailments, and only YOU are responsible for that human life for nine, sometimes ten months. That's heavy stuff! And anyone who has not done it before, really has no right to say anything about it. One thing I've gained since being pregnant is a stronger backbone and I'm not afraid to tell you what I think (not that I've had THAT much of an issue with that before...). haha! I've told a few people to shut it (politely) or that I can see why they think something, but they really don't understand and I'd rather not have your opinion. haha! I'm surprised with myself because I wouldn't normally come right out with it, I'd just nod and go about my business. All that is to say, being pregnant is not for the weak. I respect all women who have done it before me and all who are doing it now. I'm thankful for this blessing and am also human which means, sometimes I just need someone to offer support and say, what can I do to help. Even if there's nothing that can be done, it means a lot to me. I do try not to open myself up for everyone to tell me what to think by posting complaints or issues on Facebook for everyone to comment on, or by telling random people about my issues like so many people I know have, and then get upset when they get a negative response. I feel like if you do that, you're kind of asking for it. I don't want to do that to myself, so if I have trusted you enough to complain about anything I'm experiencing, it's because I trust you to be supportive. To all my lovely friends, family, and my husband who get to share that experience with me, you should feel honored. ;) lol!
I have to give my husband another shout out because not only am I learning how to deal with pregnancy, he is too. Sometimes he doesn't understand what I mean or what I'm going through, but he has thanked me multiple times for carrying his child. I believe there's nothing else in your marriage that can make a man respect his wife more, than to go nine months creating a life. Obviously he helped create that life, but the mom obviously does the heavy lifting. I'm one of the lucky ones that has a man that is truly supportive and loving no matter what happens and I am thankful for that every day. Tony is going to be an amazing father and I just can't wait to see Baby D in his arms. :')
All in all everything is going pretty smoothly and I continue to do my best to take the best care of myself and Baby D. My next appointment (May 30) we'll get to find out if we are having a boy or girl so stay tuned! I know everyone says they just want a happy and healthy baby and they don't care what the sex is, and that's definitely true for me. I want a boy and I also want a girl so I couldn't be happier to find out either way so I can assign a name to little Baby D. Not too long after we find out, I'll be on a plane headed home for a good long week! All my Boise friends better set some time aside for me because I miss you all so much! Here are a couple fun pictures I've taken since the last post:
Quote for the day:
"Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I will cherish every moment and realize the wonderment growing inside me is the only chance I'll get to assist God in a miracle"
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